Thing Two follows shortly after....
Thing Two: 'I'm not going to play with you'
Thing One: [grunt/whine/huff/sulk] 'Fine then. I'm never giving you a picture ever again'
Thing Two: [calmly] 'I'm not Playing with you'
Thing One: [More angst]
Thing Two: [calm and composed] 'I'll help you look for your camera, but I won't play with you'
Thing One: [increasingly agitated..approaching full tantrum]
Thing Two: [Controlled yet stern] 'I'm not playing with you because you've been sent upstairs for a reason'
Several hours later and they're both somewhat mopey as their friend is at a Karate and they can't possibly think of anything to do with each other. Thing two is currently midst sulk because I informed her that if she wishes to play outside she must wear 'proper' clothes and change out of the Orphan Annie-esque dress she insists on wearing which is a remnant from a dance costume of my childhood. She protests mightily that she doesn't have any clean trouser and no tights (clearly the tight and trouser munching fairy must have paid a visit, again) despite the fact she was wearing tights with a different costume mere hours ago. In an act of defiant compromise she's now in a spotty dress with multicoloured stripy leggings and pink and yellow socks whilst I mutter to the flimsy shreds of sanity I have left 'pick your battles'.
The Husband is in bed because it's so impossibly tiring being him, don't you know. The Toddler is pausing from desecrating the entire room to munch on a green building block which is the closest thing to 'greens' that gets in his mouth these days.
It's not even lunch time and I've already had an entire Easter egg, a Cadbury's cream egg and am craving a bottle of vodka avec une straw.
Happy Zombie Day.
I'm being summoned to play cars with The Toddler. I estimate we have 5 minutes before Thing One & Thing Two barge in confessing their growing state of starvation.
Plus point of the day so far? I managed a whole bath without any of The Family coming in the bathroom for a shit. That really is a rare and splendid occurrence.
 - No cars, Sorry The Toddler, Thing One & Thing Two are sooooooooooooooooooooooooo hungry.